Sweet memories

This few days, seems like back to the time when we all still in the same school gok..We go countdown at Christmas eve, go yam cha, go swimming almost every morning..

Aniway, holiday is going to finish, and everybodi is goin back to our own life style. Although i feel a bit sad to be separately with all of you, i think tat its the time all of us to grow up and learn to life by our own.

No matter what happen, you all will always in my heart and i will forever remember how we spent our time together in this moment!

Hope that all of you also will keep this sweet memories together with me..

Death

Haiz..i find that recently,everything around me look no so good.

Yesterday, my dad's uncle,which is my grandma's third brother, had pass away.he got cancer..about two weeks ago,me and my mum and my grandma went visit him.and at that time,he look still good..dont look like sick people.
but just like suddenly,he had pass away.

And today,also my dad's uncle,also had pass away.hes my grandma's cousin's husband.he also got cancer..but i think its also a good thing for him to release himself from the sickness.before this when we went visit him,he look so pain..fell so sad look him suffering like this.

So this few days,i think im gona be very busy again..to attend the both funerals.

Care about our health before its too late..

Camp..

Wow..its really such a long time that i dint update my blog!surely,its not that im lasy..its because that im too busy!

Actually,i just came back from a camp in Dusun Minda Resort,Kuala Nerang.if you ask me where it is,i also dont know how to tell you..haha!its far away from city..somemore my dad says that sometimes you can find tiger nearby there..but i dont know that is it i can trust him because he always play jokes on me!

Well..my body is full of wound afta the camp.the activities that we have is really very interesting..and this include FLYING FOX and others.but something make me really very PAISEH is that while im playing flying fox,i get stuck at the half way..and all the people around laughing at me!really so bad these people..laughing at a pretty girl!wakaka..

There,i got many new friends..but most of them is younger than me.most of them only 15 or 16 years old..but anyway,when they guess my age,all of them got the wrong answer..they says that im only 15!oh my god..im already 18 and going to be 19 in a few month later!

Anyway,im really happy and enjoy myself in the camp..

And going to another music camp in December!

Hey friends,enjoy your holidays!

25 minutes

Even 1 second,everything can change..

Be honest!

I still remember last time when im still studying in kindergarten,whenever theres exam and test,my teacher ever wont forgot to tell us this:

"Do not see ur friend's answer and also dont let ur friends to see ur answer!"

I think that everyone also have this experience,right?everyone of us,have been taught to be honest in our exam by our teachers since we are still little kids.if a little kid also know this 'exam general rule',i really dont understand why some people who are almost same age as me,a matured person,still dont understand this rule.

Today,finally our exam had over.its really tired to be totured by the exam for such a long period of time..two weeks i think.but,what i really feel,is not the physically tired,but my mentally is even more tired than my body.

I dont really did good in my exam.my chemistry paper,is the worst paper that i have ever take before.i just can solve a few questions..the others one,i have to use my tank-----to BOOM all those questions!

Actually,i have a chance to get a better result in my chemistry paper..because pravin showed me his answer sheet.but,i just ignored him..i prefer to get a worse result rather than cheated everyone cause i know that i cant cheat myself.as if i get good result also,i wont be proud of myself because i know that im not deserve for it.

Anyway,there is SOMEONE,who cheated in many papers:MUET,pengajian am and so on.actually at first,i dont care if someone cheat in exam because its not my business at all.but,its quite over that this person,not only cheat in one or two subject..its more than that.

Honestly,i also cheated before in exam with my gang of friends when im stil in form one and form two.but last time,the purpose all of us copy the answer is because we just wana to pass up an answer sheet which has answer on it..at least not a blank paper for teacher!but when im more mature,i understand that it really mean nothing to copy the answer from others.if u got the first place in the exam also,u wont be proud of yourself and also dont dare to tell others that you got the first place because its not belongs to you..cause you din get it by your own.

But,this SOMEONE,cheated not because he dint study for his exam.actually,i think that he had study so hard before exam and for sure,he can get a good result.anyway,he not care wether how good his result is.what he wana,is to beat up the person who get number one in last exam.and..i think that maybe he had got it.just now,we get know that this SOMEONE,had beat up the last number one in the chemistry paper.anyway,none of us fell happy for him..because hes not deserve for it.sumore..he still dare to let us know how good his result is.

What is the purpose to be the best if you dint get it by yourself?it means nothing..right?as if all of us dont know that bout this matter also,theres still one person who know bout it..its yourself.you can cheat everyone,but you cant cheat yourself.

So..please be honest!

Can anyone tell me?

Yesteday after school,saw xin nian's message,ask me wether wana go out wit all of them,for a old friends gathering.but,i give her an excuse..actually its also not an excuse,because i really gona have my chemistry paper today.so,i was absent to the gathering.

Today,tong tell me bout what hapened yesterday while they were together.he said that its really a fun gathering..everione talk bout own's life.

Actually.i also dont know what really hapened on me.recently,i really lasy to hang out or go anywhere with them.i think maybe its because i got bad impression when last time me,tong,lyn n hwai hang out in cs.its not really a bad impression..just i fell that something had change.lyn and hwai closer..and me and tong closer.fell so strange..

Its me who had change,or everyone also had change?izit its my problem having this kind of feeling?

I really had confuss..bout friends..

Can anyone tell me?

Think carefully..

Yesterday night, i have a chat with jia wen in phone. we have chat a lot of things...and seems like hes also quite a friend to chat with.

Yesterday also, once again he wana me to become his girlfriend. haiz..seems like hes stil not understand what i have tell him last time.

Haiz..im really scared of all these love things by now. atually, love and couple relationship, is not this easy thing. its a deep knowledge..

So friends, next time before you wana start a new relationship, think it carefully. once u have make a mistake inthis stuff,even just a smal mistake, it will influence ur whole life.

Sad story between a guy and a girl...

Recently, my mood so bad.

That night, i have clear up everithing with ys.actually, and honestli, i dont wana just be simple friend with him. im just cheating him..and the most, is cheat myself. i reli duno wat i think..i duno wether im reli happy with this decision, or im sad of it.

Honestli, i dunwan to clear up everithing with him. its like..haiz, i also duno how to say. me and him, already in such a relationship almost one year. no ani improvement..more than good friend, but not yet couple. i duno how will this last for, and also dont dare to think about it.

Atuali, im not angry that he dunwan to couple with me. the main problem is,he always make me sad, hurt and disapointed. duno how many nights, i hide myself in my room, tearing for him.i never cry for anione although last time i break up with my ex-boyfriend. just him..

Wat i wana, atuali is very simple. i just wana share my hapi and sad with him...and also wana share his feeling or mood with. but,it seems like so hard for us...he always keep everithing by his own.although problems bout he and me, he also seldom tell me what atuali he think in his heart. i have to gues everithing..even include is it hes stil like me.

You always tell me that u will make me disapointed. u din try..how u know that u will disapointed me?i believe that, as long as u wana make me happy, sure you can make it. sometimes, trust yourself...

For sure, i hope that theres a new start for us. but i really dont know what u actually think by now..

Haiz..i really fell speechless for our relationship..

You will always in my heart..

Just now when i go to my friendster page,i saw shang yi's photo.there are a few photos tat he take wit his girl friend.duno why..jus suddenli fell like so hurt..haiz!

Its been already long time when the time i was in relationship with him.that time im stil in form four..its already two years.

Atuali,oso duno why i suddenli feel sad..maybe because last time he really treat me very very good and caring.but now,he had change the love to another girl.

I think i realy make a mistake last time.atuali at tat time,i realy love him..hes the first person tat i really love.but hes in kulim..so far away from here.sumore at tat time,my mum keep my handphone and its really hard for us to contact.although everyday he also phone to me,but how long he can maintain?i really dont have confident to myself and him..its really tough in our relationship.so at last,i tell him i wana study first and break up.he says that he will wait for me..

But sometimes,things will change as the time passes.i may be in love with someone else one day later..but i think that i will keep him forever in my heart as a person i really love.

And i also believe that once you really love a person before,you will forever love him..no matter at that time you already have another boyfriend or even husband.

Trust me...

Vacation in Cameron..

Hey..friends!how u all enjoy ur raya holidays?well,i have been to cameron highlands.

I have been there for 3 days and 2 nights with all my family members.so, i would say tat its like a famili days for all of us.....

Aniway,wat i remember most is not the scenery or the handsome europe guys..but its the DAMN COLD weather!

Its realy fun for me..

Little form 4 kids..

A fews day ago,i have a movie with a friend in center square.While waiting for the movie, i hang alone to Popular book store.

At the moment i was finding the latest piano score, something happened.A group of guys,keeping hanging beside me.i fell weird at tat time..but i just ignore them.

Then suddenly,a guy,come and ask for my handphone number.OH MY GOD..i was reali shocked at that time.Honestli,it was the first time this matter happened on me..

But anyway,im not realy happy bout this matter..

BECAUSE ALL OF THEM SEEMS LIKE YONGER THAN ME..ONLY FORM 4 KIDS!!!

Mistake...

I tink tat i reli had make a BIG mistake last a few weeks...i tink my feeling to him is just some kind of misunderstanding.its like...haiz,tat feeling just cant last long.

Atuali,love someone,means tat we must accept the every part of that person.but it seems like i just can accept part of him...even less than half.so,thats not the true love,isn't it?

Luckily,i have notice this mistake and really mean to correct it all over again!

So,i just wana tell you :IM AM VERI SORRY,UR TOTALLY NOT MY TRUE LOVE!

你肩膀上有蜻蜓吗？

在一个非常宁静而美丽的小城，有一对非常恩爱的恋人，他们每天都去海边看日出，晚上去海边送夕阳，每个见过他们的人都向他们投来羡慕的目光。

可是有一天，在一场车祸中，女孩不幸受了重伤，她静静地躺在医院的病床上，几天几夜都没有醒过来。白天，男孩就守在床前不停地呼唤毫无知觉的恋人；晚上，他就跑到小城的教堂里向上帝祷告，他已经哭干了眼泪。

一个月过去了，女孩仍然昏睡着，而男孩早已憔悴不堪了，但他仍苦苦地支撑着。终于有一天，上帝被这个痴情的男孩感动了。于是他决定给这个执着的男孩一个例外。上帝问他：“你愿意用自己的生命作为交换吗？”男孩毫不犹豫地回答：“我愿意！”上帝说：“那好吧，我可以让你的恋人很快醒过来，但你要答应化作三年的蜻蜓，你愿意吗？”男孩听了，还是坚定地回答道：“我愿意！”

天亮了，男孩已经变成了一只漂亮的蜻蜓，他告别了上帝便匆匆地飞到了医院。女孩真的醒了，而且她还在跟身旁的一位医生交谈着什么，可惜他听不到。

几天后，女孩便康复出院了，但是她并不快乐。她四处打听着男孩的下落，但没有人知道男孩究竟去了哪里。女孩整天不停地寻找着，然而早已化身成蜻蜓的男孩却无时无刻不围绕在她身边，只是他不会呼喊，不会拥抱，他只能默默地承受着她的视而不见。

夏天过去了，秋天的凉风吹落了树叶，蜻蜓不得不离开这里。于是他最后一次飞落在女孩的肩上。他想用自己的翅膀抚摸她的脸，用细小的嘴来亲吻她的额头，然而他弱小的身体还是不足以被她发现。

转眼间，春天来了，蜻蜓迫不及待地飞回来寻找自己的恋人。然而，她那熟悉的身影旁站着一个高大而英俊的男人，那一刹那，蜻蜓几乎快从半空中坠落下来。人们讲起车祸后女孩病得多么的严重，描述着那名男医生有多么的善良、可爱，还描述着他们的爱情有多么的理所当然，当然也描述了女孩已经快乐如从前。

蜻蜓伤心极了，在接下来的几天中，他常常会看到那个男人带着自己的恋人在海边看日出，晚上又在海边看日落，而他自己除了偶尔能停落在她的肩上以外，什么也做不了。

这一年的夏天特别长，蜻蜓每天痛苦地低飞着，他已经没有勇气接近自己昔日的恋人。她和那男人之间的喃喃细语，他和她快乐的笑声，都令他窒息。

第三年的夏天，蜻蜓已不再常常去看望自己的恋人了。她的肩被男医生轻拥着，脸被男医生轻轻地吻着，根本没有时间去留意一只伤心的蜻蜓，更没有心情去怀念过去。

上帝约定的三年期限很快就要到了。就在最后一天，蜻蜓昔日的恋人跟那个男医生举行了婚礼。 蜻蜓悄悄地飞进教堂，落在上帝的肩膀上，他听到下面的恋人对上帝发誓说：我愿意！他看着那个男医生把戒指戴到昔日恋人的手上，然后看着他们甜蜜地亲吻着。蜻蜓流下了伤心的泪水。

上帝叹息着：“你后悔了吗？”蜻蜓擦干了眼泪：“没有！”上帝又带着一丝愉悦说：“那么，明天你就可以变回你自己了。”蜻蜓摇了摇头：“就让我做一辈子蜻蜓吧……”

有些缘分是注定要失去的，有些缘分是永远不会有好结果的。爱一个人不一定要拥有，但拥有一个人就一定要好好去爱他。你的肩上有蜻蜓吗？

I love you..dear!

Haiz..i think i reli love him tis time.so hard for me to believe it..coz last time is me who wana break up.

He says tat he stil love me..should i believe him?actuali,tis question is nonsense..coz i have already choose to believe him,tats why im so love him by now and wish to get him.

Aniway..it sems like hard for us to b wat we used to be as time passes.las time,we are in the same class and he just sit beside me.everiday,we spend our time together wheneva having class,recess,afta skul and even during 2syen.reli mis las time..fell like being care and protect by him.wheneva and whateva things i need or problem i face,he will settle it for me..

Now,we are different class.hes in d first floor..while im in d ground floor of d school building.reli hard for us to meet each other..

And when during recess time,im wit my friends,n hes wit his friends.even we meet oso,we din say even a word.is it because of time passes and sumthing had change without noticing by us?

Just now,i dream bout him..d first time i dream bout him afta we study in d same skul for d sixth years.haha..so funi,n so weird rite?

I think..tis is a sign to show me that i have fall in love wit him..

Dear..i love u!!

I miss him so much..

Haiz..i reli cant concentrate during class today lah!i oso duno why..inside my mind,all is just about him.

Fel like wana to talk to him..but fel shy..

Atuali,im quite angri tat he din come and talk to me,or spent time wit me even during recess.i always hope tat he can come for me..but he always make me dissapointed.

Im quite jealous wen i saw he always wit other gals in front of me..its not tat im jealous to those gals.wat im jealous is he rather spend time wit them..but its oso not hes fault.because im oso always wit a gang of guy friends in front of him..i think maybe both of us oso wana make each other angri and jealous.coz tis shows tat we are being mind by each other..

Wat i can onli hope is..he,as a guy,can be d sporting person to take d action first.

Friends..

Haiz..izit reli so hard 2 get a real n simple frnds?at first,i tot i hv get a gang of new close frnds.but..i find tat mayb i hv wrong.

Atuali,btwen me n hao han,is reli jz simple n pure frndship.but duno wat hapen..al d gang of gals tat i tot r my frnds,start gosiping behind me.honestli,im quite mind alreadi wen they gosip among themselves..but now even a frnd whos not in here,oso know bout tis matter.

Im curious..izit d cause of tis gossip,is jz bcoz i frnd wit a person tat they dun like..o even hate i tink!

Some ppl advise me 2 explain 2 those who i used 2 treat as my FRNDS..but i dun tink i wil do it.i promise 2 myself tat i wont beg 2 anione jz 2 get sumting,even a frndship.as if i wil lose all of them also..i dont tink its a waste o sad thing.wat 4 i wana those persons with such characters 2 b my frnds?it doesnt mean aniting..